I'll Take A Holiday Far Away

Do you have those songs in your life that, when they appear on your iPod, you remember the first time you heard them? I have plenty of those and I love it when they pop up here and there. It really does take me back. This weekend I traveled to Oberlin, KS to see my cousin Andy and his family since they were back home from Colorado to play a show. I really don't get enough of them. Andy and I have great, in-depth talks that I enjoy. Anyway, on the way home, at about 1 in the morning, the song "Tickets and Passports" by Holiday Parade came on over the radio and it had probably been 8 months since I have heard that song. This song is one of those that I can remember the first time I ever heard it.

I was on the road in between Wichita and Emporia at about 3 or 4 in the morning, driving by myself. It was right before Christmas time and the sky was crisp and bright, like it can only be during the winter months. I still had my Sebring at the time. I had just seen Abandon Kansas that night in Wichita and it didn't turn out well at all. My ex-girlfriend had just got engaged that night. See all the details I remember? I will post the lyrics to the song now and continue the post after that.

I'll take a holiday far away
To where the bright lights burn a little less every day
I'm going to find a place that's just for me
It may take forever
I know, Forever'd be ok

I'm counting down the headlights thinking
That I believe the world is sinking
And everybody longs for something
I'd give it all again to feel it

I met a pretty girl from the coast of Spain
And as she'd count the stars she knew them all by name
She had the saddest eyes I've ever seen
But when she smiled
I'd know, Exactly what she means

Chorus

It's how the sunlight burns my eyes
Every morning when I rise
It's how I'm pulled to the horizon
Like a love that just won't die
And when the sun becomes the moon
It breaks the world I fell into
It's how it all comes back to you
And I know, I'm not going to change

Chorus

I'll run until the end of the time
The second hand slowly unwinds
There's time to rest after I die
And until then these days are like
Our last goodbye to what we know
We'll pack out bags and hit the road
These tickets and passports lead me home
As we sing all night

I think the reference to the headlights was what first got my attention to the song. The lyrics about longing for something and giving it all to feel lit again really hit home since my ex had just gotten engaged as well. I was happy for her but once I was all alone I felt like I was then missing something. That night was also the first time I had spent time alone with a girl that I am very good friends with now but at the time we had only known each other about a month. After leaving her house I just had this feeling that she was someone I could see myself with, that she could fill that feeling I had been searching for. Of course that didn't happen but this was the first girl who I really felt like I had a connection with. She was and is someone I compare others to to see if they would stack up against her. As the saying goes, a guy and a girl are only friends because one of them had feelings for the other at the beginning.

The ending of this song made me want to just keep driving. At this time in my life I was working still and just doing everything on a whim, like going to see Abandon Kansas. It was a great freedom that I miss sometimes because school gets in the way these days but something that I'm glad I had a chance to enjoy. This song took me back to that night, to those days of late night driving. It feels now like I was running from something, but what? Who knows but after listening to this song on repeat for about an hour I moved on to the next random song. I couldn't tell you what it was or any other song from that 4 hour drive but this one I won't forget. It makes me appreciate my relationships with friends and makes me wonder what might have been?